Life just works

Sam and I have been participating in a seminar on Integrity lately, which has brought many fun distinctions to our life. In this seminar, integrity is simply defined as having workability in one's life. It is separate from morality in that something can be moral, but still not have integrity because it doesn't work.

This one has been difficult for me because during the course, I came to realize that I have no integrity whatsoever and my life doesn't work. I tend to avoid making commitments and then tend to not keep the ones I make. After that happens, I usually feel terribly guilty and then go hide under a rock and don't answer the phone or e-mails. This doesn't work for people and has consequently left me in a place where I have almost no friends.

It finally all came together for me yesterday. My best friend was terribly angry with me for leaving her high and dry lately and I had no time to go sit down with her to talk things out. I wrote her a long, teary e-mail about how I was sorry and discussing some finer points of our relationship. I consequently made my kids late to their pool party.

On the way to the pool party, I realized I could ask another mom to keep an eye on my kids and then go see to my best friend. I did just that and then while we were mid-stride in conversation, the other mom called letting me know that it started raining, everyone was leaving the pool, and she needed me to come get my kids. On the way to the pool, I realized I hadn't called my seminar group members to let them know I had scheduled a group meeting for 6pm the same day.

I called another group member (the one who already knew) and asked her if she could call everyone else. Then I called someone else for coaching so that I could get what didn't have integrity (that I didn't think of my group members until 3pm) and get clear on that. I picked up my kids, took them home, then headed back to see my best friend and complete our conversation.

I was so powerful in my communication that by the time I got to the seminar at 7pm (after apologizing to my group), I was absolutely high on how well things could work if I simply honor my word. I was floored by this notion and really got that's all there is to making life work, just give my word and then honor it.

Here's to honoring word and living powerfully!!